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A quick but quantum note

August 2025

meditation science

This is going to be a quick note, I really want to share this with y’all. Now I’m able to write it, the last couple of weeks I couldn’t but now, that I found some discipline, I’m ready

2 weeks ago, I had a huge anxiety attack, I had like 162 bpm like from nowhere and then I felt quite tired for the rest of the day. I invested the following days recovering myself and it was a hell of a work. Some of the things that caused this was for instance, a person that I loved so much, so so much that I was acumulating things when that love was not the same from her. In quantum mechanics, I would define this as a failed quantum entanglement, no coincidence why I decided to learn quantum physics alongside with Linux and hardcode low-level programming. I still wish that person the best of the best. I don’t know if she’s reading this tbh but I love u. I just need time to heal.

Also, I was testing every Linux distro for my host (I went from Ubuntu, Zorin, Vanilla…, Void, CachyOS and Arch. 9 distros in less than one month.) I think I was looking out for the “perfect and free-of-fear distros”. Fear because my choice criteria was considering a distro that is completely FOSS but at the same time, a rolling release with no versions and secure. I lasted 2 days with Void, all the xbps packages broke when my scheduler used the cronjob scheduled to update the entire system at 9 am everyday, without reading the patch notes. (Also it didn’t help that GNOME has way less support in runit than systemd). I learnt a lot from that. I think I used Fedora Silverblue for 3 days before realizing that the stable versions had EOLs written in /etc/os-release and I didn’t like that (I know I can edit that file with vi but at that time I was kinda lost tbh). Then I tried CachyOS but I moved to Arch cuz CachyOS has less devs and has this risk that a system could ever dissappear, I have no options but to reinstall that system and I didn’t want to do that. But after 2 weeks of Arch with my hyprland setup, I started to develop signs of moderate anxiety levels becore having that tough and short pain in my left arm. I was also trying to protect my thinkpad taking it everywhere. So many things happened and I was overthinking them

After this thing happened, my first instinct was to talk with my dad. He helped me with some hand-written things and then I noted some things in Sarnion (my forever iPad). As soon as I realized it, I discovered that I have to take my iPad wherever I go just to note something to feel the quantum energy between my being and the vibrational energy of Sarnion, even if I’m not writing on it. (Maybe I’ll talk with my teachers about this when doing an exam haha, the least thing I wanna do is to copy) Also, Eryon (my free and modified indestructible apple watch) and Erpion (still developing this quantum energy, but its a Casio F91 w) and Crescion (my powerful bracelet) are with me always, despite my surroundings. I learnt this: “you have to dictate your environment and don’t let the environment dictate you”

Also I was chatting with some girls I’ve not seen them irl yet (well, non-yet). I noticed some patterns of non-interested from their sides and despite I was not looking for anything, it feels quite bad when someone chooses other priorities over than yours. In classical physics, I would define this as a flying out-of-nowhere particle (if y’all have good name for this, lmk) where these girls have a high cinetic energy and a low potential energy. When they chose other priorities instead of me, they sent some photons to the opposite direction where I was located, quite interesting. Also, in networking topologies, I would say that some people usually with a good TCP connection but then they changed radically to UDP, so its normal that their ACKs are going to be radically different. I’m expecting a TCP connection and it feels quite bad when you realize that all the SYNs are not being recieved successfully. Alice read the message that Bob sent but Alice doesn’t want to reply back. In computing, its just a 503 error

What I am trying to tell y’all with this is that I tried to build a relationship between all the stuff that happened to me in the last couple of months with some of my passions as way to relax myself, that everything is ok and that some of the things I see normally are uncertain since quantum physics is relatively uncertain. I’m still learning a lot of things ngl, but it is quite strange y’know? I feel this thing helped to develop this sense of curiosity. Some physicists take their time in their spare own solitud time to reflect in uncertain but real things. That time is mine.

As for Xolo Linux, I’m still building it. I changed my server from an EC2 instance to my little fridge (It has a shape of it haha). It has AlmaLinux 8.10 and 24GB of RAM. I’m setting up a Wireguard VPN so I can work remotely. Since Xolo is based on Debian Stable (not Testing), I had to build a podman container with low-level root privilages since live-build requires some services from systemd. Don’t worry, SELinux is setted up properly and my subnet will have just one rule for the port 51994. Also, I’ve decided to take this thing much slower since I tried to rush some things and I need to adquire some experience before (and to make new friends as well). Because of this, I’m preparing myself to join as an official Debian member as a DD (Debian developer) but first, going as a DM (Debian mantainer). I love Debian, I love Linux. Gunnar Wolf is a great great guy, he’s been teaching me some of the things that you could not find in a proper encyclopedia. If you guys want to chat with him, his mail is gwolf@debian.org.

Some of the things that Xolo will feature are

I’m still discovering some things when it comes to my inner self, my stuff and extensions of life, quantum laws, astronomy and computing. I just have to take one step at a time and I have to accept myself that some of the things that I know, I don’t know them. Uncertain but real.

Love y’all :)

© 2025 Yayo   •